B-MOVIE BLOCKBUSTERS: The Dark
BACK OF THE VHS BLURB:
After a slew of killings within the city, the inept police force, the father of a slain girl, and a TV reporter looking to make a splash, get tangled up in the pursuit of who is doing the killings. As a local psychic gets visions of the deaths and gives a mediocre effort to do anything about it, the city begins to revolt as no one can do anything about the Mangler, who might be a zombie. Turns out it was an alien werewolf with laser eye blast abilities.
So...WTF did I just watch?
MOVIE: The Dark
YEAR: 1979
DIRECTOR: John "Bud" Cardos (and uncredited but also Tobe Hooper)
CAST: William Devane, Cathy Lee Crosby, Richard Jaeckel, Keenan Wynn, Jacquelyn Hyde
B-MOVIE HIGHLIGHTS:
So, the best way I found to describe this gem is an “A quality” B movie. What we get as an intro is some spaceship/meteor/red flash shooting in the night sky. Some text that is narrated to us as well talks of alien life being out there, and if it comes to Earth, it may not be friendly. No shit. But here we go.
A woman is leaving a movie theater when all the lights go out. Strange music and odd whispers (which I do not know if the character can hear the whispers or if that is just for us) accompany her fearful exit of the area. She doesn't get far until a blue jean wearing menace grabs her and she screams into the night.
We find the local police working the case is Det. Dave Mooney (Jaeckel), and this guy is a prick. Looking like a poor plastic mold of William Shatner, this guy is pretty heartless over the fact people are being mauled and mutilated in his city. Turns out the girl who died is the daughter of our lead man, hipster Roy Warner. Or horror writer Steve Dupree. He's both. Wacky, I know. So, Roy is traumatized by hearing his daughter has died and he comes to ID the body. Turns out our buddy Det. Mooney knows Roy, as he dealt with Roy being in jail for three years after killing the dude who was cheating on his wife. No Shawshank here, just back story, I guess.
Roy is showed his daughter’s body, which we don't get to see, but it makes Roy dry heave so it must be bad. Something about her face getting ripped off, but pics or it didn't happen. Det. Mooney meets with Roy at a bar, where they talk and argue. It’s where we find out Roy is also the horror writer Steve Dupree. Mooney warns Roy off, saying if he interferes in the case he will be booked. That should've been enough to deter him, right? WRONG.
As this is going one, two more storylines come a waltzing in. We have psychic De Renzy (Hyde) who keeps seeing the deaths of the killer, called the Mangler (sweet name, too), but she doesn't really do much. She tells old Det. Mooney, who doesn't buy in to all that bullshit.
We also have reporter Zoe Owens, who is tired of reporting on bikini model shows and other lame ass stories, and is trying to make a break for herself, just like a horror Veronica Corningstone. She wants to run a piece on the Mangler, and finally gets her way. Her piece comes off basically shitting on Steve Dupree for writing violent stories, because that's why his daughter died? I don't know, 1970's news stories are just like Anchorman I guess.
The killings keep piling up, and each time we are gifted the odd whispers and strange music. Is the werewolf dude making these sounds? Ambiance? No clue, but its pretty cool. Wearing the same blue jeans, the Mangler keeps on killing. The second kill introduces us to his werewolf like physique and that he can shoot lasers from his eye. Yes. You read that right. AN ALIEN WEREWOLF THAT SHOOTS LASER FROM HIS EYES. If that hasn't sold you already pack it up, because the rest of the movie is basically waiting for more sweet eye laser scenes.
There are some more great little scenes as we go. A guy who thinks carrying a gun with him will keep him safe is proved wrong as the Mangler grabs him by the face and throws him into a fence. No lasers needed when you are a giant bad-ass.
The city itself starts to riot as the police can't do shit about the killings. Roy keeps investigating despite Mooney's threats. A little person sells a paper with the headline, "Mangler's A Zombie". This movie literally can do no wrong it seems.
Eventually, Zoe and Roy work together. De Renzy gets more visions, and one straight from the Mangler, which leaves her house ransacked and De Renzy with a stroke face. She tells Roy the beast is getting stronger with each kill and will soon be invincible. She tells Roy a young actor is next, and they must find him to find the beast. Turns out finding a specific young actor in Los Angeles is tough, but Roy and Zoe manage to do it. We end up with Roy and Zoe tailing this actor, and they in turn are being tailed by Mooney and his partner. We reach our climax and oh my is it epic.
The police descend on the Mangler, who blasts the ever-living shit out of a bunch of cops. That laser attack is brutal. Some get vaporized, some explode, it's just chaos. It's a long drawn out scene of cop after cop shooting the beast just to be laser blasted to death. Eventually Roy just sets the Mangler on fire, he burns up and like a phoenix disappears within the flames.
This was such a fun ride. Great and goofy kills, and let me repeat AN ALIEN WEREWOLF WITH LASERS IT SHOOTS OUT OF ITS EYES. Really, is there anything you need to know? Get out there and watch this film, and watch it, in THE DARK. Truly fitting for a B-MOVIE BLOCKBUSTER.
