My Dark Vanessa - A Gut-Wrenching Experience
Wow. This book is a very special specimen. I was completely pulled in. The story is about a girl named Vanessa who delves into an inappropriate relationship with her high school teacher, Mr. Strane. It is written in a conversational tone from Vanessa's perspective, bouncing between her adult years and her youth when the relationship started.
I was seeing things through Vanessa's eyes, craving the attention of an older authority figure, clutching at the need to feel special during such sensitive years. I was understanding her desire and her complicity in a relationship that was not okay. I couldn't believe how easy it was for me to empathize with the way she acted, to mentally give Mr. Strane the benefit of the doubt because he 'always asked permission' before acting on carnal urges.
This story is the epitome of putting a frog in water and slowly increasing it to a boiling point. The frog just stays put because it doesn't understand the implications of each small change in temperature that gradually leads to an uncomfortable end. It's a ride you wish you had not gotten onto. This book shows just what kind of brainwashing goes into long-term grooming; the manipulation that needs to take place to cement a 'we're in love, people just don't understand' mindset in a young girl. It shows the seemingly positive trust built between Strane and Vanessa, which later changes to become her inability to trust in the adult relationships she has with herself and others.
It's so moving, so disturbing, and so eye-opening. I feel like I underwent hypnotherapy and experienced this whole life through Vanessa and came out understanding this type of situation in a dark new way. I closed the book appreciating that from an outsider's perspective it may appear black and white, but from inside it is every shade of gray. If people grasped this concept more, it might prove to be the best defense against that type of behaviour; we could spot the signs early, and give young girls the confidence they need to see the situation for what it is long before it changes them forever.
Read this book.
